Posts Tagged ‘breastfeeding’

Breastfeeding in Public: What’s a mom to do?

Tuesday, August 30th, 2016

What kinds of images come to your mind when you think of breastfeeding in public? We often think primarily of the stories about moms who were breastfeeding in public and someone, usually a stranger, asked them to cover up. This can cause feelings of anxiety about how to breastfeed in public for moms who have not done it before.

First, let’s talk about what your rights are as a breastfeeding mom in Colorado, and how to be comfortable with breastfeeding outside of your home, free to feed your baby when he or she is hungry without worry of being embarrassed or harassed.

Colorado breastfeeding law 25-6-302 states quite clearly: “A mother may breastfeed in any place she has a right to be.”

Now you know that as long as you are allowed to be there, you can breastfeed! It’s pretty straightforward! The law protects and supports you as a breastfeeding mom.

Should you cover up while breastfeeding?

“Should” is a strong word. In short, if it helps you feel more comfortable to breastfeed in public, then, yes! If you or your baby struggle with covers or dislike them, then don’t bother! It is not your responsibility to make sure others around you are comfortable when your baby is eating.There are many, many different kinds of covers that you can buy or make yourself.

My favorite breastfeeding accessory was the nursing tank. I could un-snap from the top, pull baby in close, and latch him on without anyone noticing. My belly was completely covered. It was nice not having to lift up my shirt or pull my breast out above my shirt. This was the most discreet way that I found to do it. It gave me the confidence to breastfeed anywhere that I needed to, including the store, church, or at someone else’s house.

But what if someone confronts you while you’re breastfeeding?

Be reassured that most of the time, no one will even notice you are breastfeeding in public. It is rare that someone is asked to stop breastfeeding by a stranger. The media would show otherwise, but don’t pay attention to that! The stories you see on Facebook, etc, will give you undue fear and anxiety. Be confident that you can feed your baby and meet his or her basic needs in peace.

What should you do in the unlikely event that someone does say something to you? First and foremost, try to stay calm. You are representing breastfeeding moms everywhere and you have an opportunity to set a good example and be non-inflammatory. You could even role-play what you might say with your partner or a friend ahead of time.

State to the stranger that you are protected by law to freely breastfeed. Let them know that you are meeting your baby’s basic need and that you have every right to do so. Then look deeply into your sweet baby’s eyes and think about how much you love them and love being able to sustain them 100% from your own body! Amazing, right?

In summary, the best people to talk to about breastfeeding in public are the moms who have already done it successfully. Get ideas from them about how they do it. You might be surprised by what you hear. Most of them are probably going to tell you that they quickly learned how to feed the baby while out-and-about with little to no problems.  ❤️

Grace Under Pregnancy: Responding to Horror Stories

Monday, June 22nd, 2015

Created using Canva.com

Created using Canva.com


We’ve all heard the horror stories. The homebirth turned cesarean. The induction gone wrong. The horrible hemorrhage. Cracked and bleeding nipples. Breastfeeding sabotaged by circumstances. And more. There is almost a compulsion to tell these stories, and we are often left feeling a little dazed as we walk away.

These are valid experiences, but hard to hear. Even harder is our response. Smiling and nodding seems shallow and awkward. What do you say in such situations when it doesn’t seem like there is anything right to say? None of us want to be trite, or offer mere platitudes, but what else is there?

Some advocate for setting firm boundaries and asking that only positive stories be shared. This may work among our own circle of acquaintance, where people know us and can understand where we are coming from. However, that often doesn’t feel right to do with someone we don’t know well or have only just met. It just feels wrong to hold up our hand and stop someone from telling their story.

I would like to offer another option.

Listen to their story.

Then, validate their experience. “Wow, that sounds like it was really hard for you.” A simple statement that honors the fact that they have shared part of their life with you.

Go a step further and ask them one question:

“If you could go back and change anything about your experience, what would it be?”

No one has likely asked them anything of the sort. More than likely, they have only been told “At least you have a healthy baby, and that’s all that really matters.”

Imagine what that one question could do for someone struggling with a traumatic experience. Someone who has told her story dozens of times, only finding those who could one-up her story, or who spoon fed her “healthy mom, healthy baby” platitudes.

Imagine being the first person to open up the door in the wall between this precious woman and her own healing. Perhaps no one has confirmed her struggle. Perhaps she has not been allowed to grieve what she lost. Perhaps she has been expected to get over it, no matter how much it hurt, or how few answers she has about her circumstances. Perhaps her experience has only ever been marginalized, even by well-intentioned loved ones who are simply uncomfortable with trauma.

Imagine what you could learn from hearing the answer to such a question. The information that may be between the lines of her answer that can help you confirm or change the decisions you yourself are making. Perhaps her story will be the means of preventing your own traumatic experience, and make you better equipped to handle unexpected outcomes.

Imagine being the means of turning horror into healing.

How have you handled horror stories in the past? How might you handle them in the future?

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany

This is where your pregnancy comes in!

Monday, May 4th, 2015

childbirth classes
We at Preparing for Birth are always striving to be more and more relevant to our clients and students, and we cannot do that without input from you! We are starting up the ol’ blog again, but we would rather not write about anything that you are not interested in. Of course, we want to cover new ground as more and more new evidence and information come to light, but it’s always nice to revisit topics that are key to you, our readers.

So, would you be so kind as to share in the comments what topics you are most interested in reading more about? Here are some ideas to get you started:

 

  • Doulas: Labor, antepartum, postpartum, and more.
  • Informed consent and conscious agreement.
  • Pregnancy myths debunked.
  • Home birth and midwifery.
  • Client and student birth stories.
  • Photos and videos.
  • Podcasts.
  • Book and product reviews.
  • Birth art/poetry/music.
  • Childbirth education.
  • Tips, tricks, and hacks for pregnancy, labor, birth, postpartum, and newborns.
  • Babywearing.
  • Breastfeeding myths.
  • Pregnancy fitness.
  • Pregnancy & special food needs (vegan, paleo, etc).

What else would you add? This is where you come in! Leave a comment, and share what you would like to read about here!

NEW Class Schedule at Preparing For Birth!

Tuesday, April 28th, 2015

Click to go to registration page!

Click to go to registration page!

Have you registered yet? We are accepting registrations for our May/June and July/August classes! Register for July/August classes by June 1st, and receive an early-bird thank you gift!

Here’s what our Tuesday night line-up looks like:

    Essentials for Childbirth 4-week Series

  • May 5th-26th
  • July 7th-28th
  • Essentials for Postpartum 4-week Series

  • June 2nd-23rd
  • August 4th-25th

Wondering About Weekend Options?

    Early Pregnancy Workshop*

  • May 9th
  • July 11th
  • Essentials for Childbirth Condensed

  • May 16th
  • July 18th
  • Life With Baby

  • May 23rd
  • July 25th
  • Essentials for Postpartum Condensed

  • May 30th
  • August 1st
  • Basics of Breastfeeding

  • June 6th
  • August 8th

Specialty Workshops (COMING SOON!)

  • VBAC Intensive Workshop
  • Embrace Grace Childbirth Essentials
  • And more!

While we’re at it – I want to hear from YOU! Since we’re starting up the ol’ blog again, I want to know what topics YOU are most interested in! What would you like Team Preparing for Birth to write about?

I’d like to open with a Q & A series. Email any question you have regarding home birth, midwifery, doulas, childbirth education, pregnancy, labor & birth, breastfeeding, and/or pregnancy fitness to tiffany@prepforbirth.com, and we will answer all your questions in series over the next several weeks.

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany

Brand New Class Offerings

Tuesday, April 14th, 2015

spring cleaning

We are spring cleaning at Preparing for Birth. out with the old format and in with the new! We are very excited to now be offering Saturday workshops and 8 weeks of Tuesday night classes.

Classes are now a la carte or bundled. You choose what suits you best in your pregnancy and postpartum periods.

For first time mothers, we recommend our Comprehensive Essentials Bundle. This includes every class we offer as a series.

For those who have had a baby, we recommend our Essentials for Childbirth Condensed as a refresher course and any other Saturday classes of your choosing.

For those with specific needs or require alternate day or night options, we offer in-office private classes designed with your needs in mind.

Our classroom is a comfortable, open, and inviting. It is a home away from home environment. We use modern technology alongside tried and true techniques.

For a complete listing of our classes, click here.

Preparing For Birth Has Moved!

Monday, May 12th, 2014

We are still at the same address, but we have moved upstairs into a new, more spacious office suite. We are now in Suite 201, just at the top of the stairs. The very first door. We now have three midwives working out of this office, and five doulas, all of whom are a joy to work with. Classroom space is bigger, too, which excites me to no end!

As I grow in my business, I am learning so much, and I am grateful to be a part of Preparing For Birth as it grows to better serve our community with more options for women during the perinatal period. From Early Pregnancy classes, to Essentials for Childbirth, to Life With Baby, Pregnancy Fitness, and Breastfeeding classes, we really are covering a wider range of needs at an affordable price.

Stay tuned for more information!

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany

Birthy Weekend Links

Saturday, September 14th, 2013

This week, featuring breastfeeding:

Image Credit: facebook.com/wemakemilk

Top 10 Things I’d Do If I Were Pregnant Again

Tuesday, April 10th, 2012

Image from decalsground.com

We all have things we’d like to hit the rewind button for. Today, I thought I’d share the top ten things I’d do differently if I were to miraculously find myself pregnant again. Why not? It’s not something I’ve shared before on this blog. I don’t often get very personal, but I’d like my readers to see me as a real person, who has made real decisions about birth.

So, without further ado, and in no particular order:

The Top 10 Things I’d Do If I Were Pregnant Again:

Image from richmondmidwife.com

1) Have a water birth.

The first time I’d heard of water birth was at our group tour of the birth center where DS #1 was born. In answer to another mom’s question, the midwife leading the tour said something like “No, we don’t do water births here, because we don’t think babies were meant to be born that way.” They did allow moms to labor in tubs, and I tried it. My labor practically stopped. I didn’t know then that if you get in the tub too early, the water can slow/stop your labor. I never thought twice about it all the time I was birthing my four children. Now that I have seen several water births, I would definitely choose to have a pool set up in my house for that purpose.

2) Have my placenta encapsulated.
This is an option I had no earthly idea about when I was having children. I think it could really have helped me with a whole slew of issues. I never struggled with baby blues or a PPMD, but I did have pretty roller-coaster-y emotions in the immediate postpartum days. Also, I have never been able to say that my milk supply was abundant, and I think the reassurance of the placenta pills’ ability to boost supply would have been a welcome comfort to me.

3) I would take a comprehensive, independent childbirth class.
Since I am a certified childbirth educator, I don’t think I’d actually take a full course, but I would probably take a refresher workshop of some kind, just to see if there is any new information out that would be important for me to know, and to give my husband a chance to internalize information he has heard at random since I became a doula. There is always room to grow, and I think we would both benefit from additional education.

One more thing. If I found out that I had to birth at the hospital, for some medical reason, I would definitely take a full, comprehensive course. Since I have never birthed at a hospital, I would really need to fully equip myself for the big differences I would face.

4) I would take a breastfeeding class.
Breastfeeding, for me, though a beautiful experience, was a struggle. I never had cracked, bleeding nipples. I never had to overcome hospital “booby traps,” because I never birthed in a hospital. I had the full support of my husband, my friends, and my mother.

Still, I was never able to meet my breastfeeding goals. When I look back, I know it was simply a lack of basic knowledge of how breastfeeding works. I hadn’t even read a book about it. I think that, if I were pregnant now, that is the first class I would sign up for, and would make sure I had the phone number to some good lactation support.

Image from portlandplacentaservices.com

5) I would make placenta prints.
Before I had it encapsulated, of course. I would frame them and hang them in my living room. They’re gorgeous when done correctly.

6) I would exercise.
Now that I have started trying to take care of my body, and can see the immediate benefits to my emotions, my confidence, and my overall well-being, this is something I would do during pregnancy. Though I did eat well, I never officially exercised with any of my kids, except for the occasional walk with a friend. I know that if I kept up a good exercise routine, I would probably enjoy my pregnancy more.

7) I would try a few different baby-wearing carriers.
For all four of my babies, I had a trusty ring-sling. One was a hand-me-down, and one was custom-made for me by a dear friend. I loved my ring sling, but there were some definite downsides to it. I had no idea there were any other carriers out there that would be properly supportive of my babies (Snugli’s and others like them are not ergonomically correct for a developing baby). So, if I were pregnant again, I’d hook up with the local “baby-wearing lady” in town, and try something new.

Image from hottopic.com

8) I would YouTube/Facebook/Tweet my birth.
I wasn’t on any kind of social media during my other pregnancies, but this time, all my friends would be hearing from me regularly! I’d probably try to facebook/tweet pictures and thoughts as I labor, and be able to announce my little one’s arrival as soon as he got here!

9) I would have professional prenatal photos taken.
This is something I really wish I had done before. I look at all the adorable baby bump photos around me, and sigh a little, wishing I had done the same.

10) I would have a professional photographer at my birth.
There is nothing as powerful as positive birth images. Images that reflect the intimacy, the intensity, the power, the strength, and the sacredness of birth.

There, that about covers it. I can come up with a few more, but I’ll leave that up to you! What would you do if you were pregnant again? If you’re already pregnant, what kinds of things are important to you? What are you doing to enjoy your pregnancy this time around?

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany

Social Media and You

Sunday, October 16th, 2011

Get your pregnancy, birth or postpartum story heard!

I am looking to interview several mothers/families who have been positively changed, supported or impacted emotionally, physically, socially, educationally and/or spiritually during the perinatal (pregnancy, labor, childbirth, postpartum) and/or into the first year of mothering/processing birth outcomes through the use of/participation in social media outlets (Twitter, Facebook, Google+, Forums, Message Boards, etc.).

Purpose: Information will be used to complete a speaking session about birth and social media, as well as, material for additional writing, educational sharing opportunities.

If you are interested, please email me by October 31, 2011 with your contact information, when due if pregnant, how old your baby is if in the postpartum period and how you were affected by social media.

Contact: Desirre Andrews – Owner of Preparing For Birth LLC, birth professional, blogger, mentor, healthy birth advocate and social media enthusiast. Site: www.prepforbirth.com

Email: desirre@prepforbirth.com

Inconsistent Breastfeeding Advice = Consistent Frustration for Moms & Babies

Wednesday, September 21st, 2011

I was excited to see this issue addressed at Best for Babes, because it is something I have seen over and over in pretty much every hospital birth I’ve attended as a doula.

When a woman hears one thing from her L&D nurse, another from the baby nurse, and still another from the lactation consultant, it is no surprise to see her and her baby battling uphill to do something that they were both designed to do. The amount and quality of training for the many professionals women encounter during the birth and postpartum period in the hospital varies widely. Then, there are the individual experiences of the women in the profession that – like it or not – color the advice they give.

It can make a woman’s head spin!

As a labor doula, I see so many women go from a sense of satisfaction in their labor and birth, to frustration and discouragement in the immediate postpartum period. One thing I hear all the time from these mothers is this very complaint: inconsistent advice. I’m there to help with initial latch, but I am always upfront that my training only extends that far, and for any issues they come across, they need to speak with a lactation professional.

I have begun sharing some basic tips with my clients before I tuck them into their bed in the Mom & Baby unit, in the hopes of mitigating this factor somewhat. I have seen some good results, but until some truly fundamental changes are made in most hospital lactation departments, these results are sadly limited. I find my role gravitating more and more to peer support and referrals to independent professionals.

In the interest of making even a small difference, I would like to share a little bit of advice I give to many mothers who are planning to breastfeed their babies. The most fundamental piece of advice I can share is this:

At the very least, request to see the same consultant throughout your hospital stay. This will help streamline the advice you’re given, as the consultant will have helped you from the first, and will be familiar with the options you and your baby have already tried.

Also, decline advice from anyone who is not from the lactation department, as you can have no guarantee of what they are basing their advice on. Smile, nod, and let them go about their business as you do what you think is best. And for heaven’s sake, don’t let them grab your boob and shove the baby’s head in! Babies don’t need that much “help.”

Take an independent (i.e. non-hospital), evidence-based breastfeeding class, if at all possible, especially if you have never breastfed before. Watch a lot of good breastfeeding videos (check out Dr. Jack Newman’s website).

You can also take a good breastfeeding book to the hospital with you, and consult it as needed while you’re there. Here are three great ones: The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, The Breastfeeding Book, or The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers.

You also may consider scheduling an appointment to meet with the head of the lactation department before you give birth, and ask about the qualifications, training, and philosophy of the consultants who work in your hospital. If possible, find one you seem to line up with in philosophy, and request to wait for her shift before getting any lactation advice in the hospital.

Consider your place of birth. Revisit the idea of an out-of-hospital birth place, especially if your hospital is not certified Baby-Friendly. I have yet to see homebirth moms struggle quite as much as their hospital counterparts, no matter how great the birth was. When moms and babies are comfortable, uninterrupted, and given support, they tend to have far fewer issues – and this does not really happen in the hospital, despite the kindness and good intentions of the hospital staff.

Side note: Most midwives have decent training and experience in breastfeeding basics, but if there is an issue beyond that, please turn to peer support you can find in La Leche League, or an IBCLC, stat!

Last, but not least – if you still feel the hospital is the best option for you: Did you know that you can opt to sign an AMA (Against Medical Advice) form, and get home early!? As long as both you and baby are healthy, you should be free to leave the hospital within several hours of giving birth, and try this breastfeeding thing at home in your own bed! I highly recommend this option if your hospital is known for anything that is not baby-friendly, especially if they make a habit of separating moms and babies in the early postpartum hours.

One last note.

When you try a new piece of advice, give it more than one feeding before you decide it’s not working. Trust your instinct – when you know, you know, but give each trick a solid try. This can be different for different circumstances, so make sure you always ask the advice-giver how soon you should see a difference.

I truly hope this has equipped you a little more thoroughly to navigate the first breastfeeding days, and to minimize the inconsistent advice you will receive. Hey – you can’t avoid it all!

Have you experienced this problem of inconsistent advice? How did you handle it? What was the impact on you and your baby, if any? Do you have any tips to offer?

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany Miller, CLD, CCCE