Posts Tagged ‘women’

30 Days of Gratitude, Day 2: Mentors.

Monday, November 2nd, 2015

thankful 2015 day 3Today, I want to share my gratitude for (and to) my mentor, Desirre Andrews, CPM, RM.

There is no single person who has contributed more to my growth and development, both professionally and personally, than she has in the past several years that I’ve known her. Truthfully, I don’t even quite remember how long I’ve known her, she has become such an integrated part of my life.

She is the big sister I never had. I cannot help but turn to her for advice on everything from Diva cups to marriage to grief to birth to business and even faith. She is always ready with answers that leave room for my own thought, my own application. I am free with her to pick and choose what advice makes sense and applies to my life, and which advice can be filed away for a rainy day, or passed on to someone to whom it will have more value.

Desirre is the best butt-kicking fairy a person can have, and she has more than earned her wings in my life! She is never one to just tell me what I want to hear. Instead, she calls my attention to nooks and crannies of thought that I might never have reached for, dusting off the dark corners of my common sense and intuition and helping me bring them to light.

I cannot talk about Desirre without mentioning how beautifully our brain squirrels work together. Whenever we need new marketing material, or need to brainstorm new formats for classes, we have the most fun with a whiteboard and a thesaurus. It’s really quite ridiculous. And we wouldn’t have it any other way!

I cannot thank God enough for bringing her into my life, and I look forward to a lifetime of sisterhood and friendship with her.

Do you have a mentor? Whose influence in your life are you most thankful for this year? Share in the comments!

Warmly,
Tiffany Miller
Childbirth Educator, Student Midwife

Why take childbirth classes anyway?

Monday, June 8th, 2015

Why take a childbirth class anyway-Why take childbirth classes anyway? You and baby are made for this process, so what is the big deal?  You go into labor, have many contractions, eventually become fully dilated and push out a baby. Bam. It’s nature! Right?

Not quite, I’m afraid.

In a perfect world, women would grow up around pregnancy, labor, birth and postpartum to soak it all in. Younger girls would assist the mother, participating in many aspects of her care, and would then gain valuable in-person true life experiences that give her encouragement, education, and confidence going into her own pregnancies, births, and postpartum times. Aunties, grandmothers, daughters, cousins, and friends all would participate in this womanly art of birth. If this were still the case, it would put the need for childbirth classes to an end.

Sadly, women in our culture are all too often discouraged, educated with fear, and lack confidence about all things related to pregnancy, labor, birth and early postpartum. It is a mystery to most women as they grow up, and very few have regular access to normal birth. Indeed, the body of a woman isn’t something that is expanded on widely in health classes, or talked about with any raw clarity. The female body, and what it can do, is shrouded in mystery from puberty to the end of life. So, we need good childbirth classes because women have been giving birth in a vacuum for a long time, and have lost the knowledge they once would have grown up with.

Women and babies deserve better. Women and babies deserve to have positive, foundational knowledge to pass down to the next generation. Women and babies deserve the care that can come when the veil is torn, and the mystery becomes clear.

Women learn in community. Quilting bees, canning day, and wash day didn’t really go away. It’s merely been replaced by play dates, mom groups, and social media. Childbirth classes are one more great way to bring women together over a common goal so that they can learn from each other. It serves the purpose of re-integrating the knowledge of generations of birthing women into the modern world.

A good childbirth class will help a woman and her partner to:

  • Gain current evidence-based information.
  • Learn how the female body works and why.
  • Understand how she and baby labor together.
  • Utilize tried and true techniques.
  • Be encouraged and grow in confidence.
  • Practice role-playing of common scenarios.
  • Solidify her unique birth philosophy.
  • Sharpen communication and consumer skills for real life application.

Why a childbirth class? Because women don’t need to be told what to do. They need to be helped and supported in what they believe is best for themselves and their babies. Because women need to discover that they are so much more capable and strong than they ever thought possible. Because they deserve a foundation of knowledge to base their decisions on.

Why a childbirth class? Because women deserve better than the status quo.

Tiffany & Desirre

Click HERE to see our available classes.

 

Awe & Gratitude

Monday, February 9th, 2015

I have been putting together a scrapbook of pictures, cards, letters, and memorabilia from the doula clients who have so graciously shared such items with me. As the 8×8 book comes together, I find myself full of memories of each story. I have not forgotten a single birth. Not one. Each one is a treasure I carry with me wherever I go.

There is a weight to each memory. A weight characterized by humble, gritty, glorious women at their peak vulnerability and strength. Never is a woman so beautiful as when she is bringing new life into our small world. A brand new human being, who has never existed before, has been formed painstakingly, and brought with blood, sweat, and tears into the arms of his loving parents.

It is exquisite.

And I get to be a part of it.

My gratitude for this work will never wane. Sometimes, it is hard for me to believe that this is a path God has called me to so clearly. Unequivocally, with women is where I belong.

With women.

The root meaning of the word “midwife.”

Thank you for being part of my journey. Whether you are a client, a mentor, a colleague, or a member of my amazing family, I could not do this without you.

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany

I Am A Doula

Monday, January 5th, 2015

CalebDoula.

I am a doula.

Those words, filled with so much meaning over the years, were my starting point in this birth journey I’m on. Doula is a weighty word. It’s a very different role than almost any other in birth. It encompasses so much that used to be taken for granted: that a sister, a mother, a grandmother, an auntie would be there for our births.

With our scattered society, and its driving desire to prove individual independence, that doesn’t happen as much any more. I think the rise in doulas in this country is just one sign of a shift in society’s thinking about that independence. The resurgence of old-fashioned life skills such as knitting, crocheting, quilting, canning, gardening, keeping small farm animals, bartering/trading for goods and services, and more all indicate that our society might be beginning to see the value in interdependence.

A very different concept than independence. Independence declares, “I can do it myself!” Usually in ALL CAPS. Interdependence says, “I can probably do it myself, but I would really like to have you by my side, because many hands make light work.” It’s a humble honesty that admits that we need each other, while acknowledging individual responsibility.

I like this shift in thinking. It means that each of us are needed by one another. Isn’t it a wonderful feeling to be needed?

We see it in the blog posts encouraging us to ask for help when we need it. We see it in the abundance of people who come out of the woodwork in order to sign up for meal trains. We see it in baby showers, scrapbooking parties, childbirth classes, book clubs, community gardens, homeschool groups, and knitting circles. We long for community, especially as women.

Birth is not an independent act. While it is “your” birth in one sense (individual responsibility), it is very much “our” birth in another (we need safe community in order to do it well). There are very few women who don’t need other women around them to birth, and each birth has a ripple effect on the community around it.

Enter the doula.

She brings interdependence back to birth. She encourages the mother’s individual responsibility in decision-making, while helping to meet the mother’s need for community. A doula bridges the gap between our precious, American independence, and our desire to have another woman to lean on. It is finally acceptable to need the help.

This is no bad thing, and is slowly, birth by birth, making a big impact on the way women, babies, and birth are viewed in this country.

“What’s a doula?” is a question asked less and less frequently, though we do need to keep putting the good word out there!

I am a doula.

The words still carry great weight. I have not yet burned out on standing beside women in my community while they usher new life into the world through their bodies, with the strength of Creation behind them. It is an honor, a privilege, and a blessing for me.

I am a doula.

I don’t yet know when the day will come that I utter these words for the last time, as I move forward into midwifery work. I wonder how that will feel, when it finally happens, as it surely will in the next few years.

Until then, I am a doula.

And I am grateful to be one.

Grace & Peace,
Tiffany

Fly Sister Soar

Sunday, February 14th, 2010

This is my Valentine to you all my “sisters”.  We are in this together, weaving the past, present, and future through who we are and what we do.  I ache for us women to encircle each other, grow each other and be real with each other.  Be blessed.

Sister never be satisfied with just living. Hiding. Being less. In the shadows.

Find your “it” and fly sister. Don’t fear being who you are intended to be. Shake off the layers others have put upon you. Peel off the veneer you have placed upon yourself. Soar Sister

You are a jewel worth polishing. Brilliant. Perfect. In the light.

Be you and fly sister. Adventurous and alive. Alive down into your soul. There is a splendor and beauty begging to be set free. To be seen. Soar Sister.

by Desirre Andrews