Just Me
With Woman
It is anticipation, flutters and quickening. Life and growth and unparalleled beauty. It is squeals and coos, wriggles and dimples. Hanging scales with tiny feet peeking through. It is knowledge and wisdom, training and practice. Books and research, instinct and reason. It is squatting and reaching, twisting and folding, meeting a mother and her baby right…
Read MoreFaith, Family, Midwifery, and Such
I long for real community. A place where women and their families can come together to connect, support, and just do life together. As I stood over my cutting board, processing 40 pounds of boneless skinless chicken breasts by myself, I thought how much more enjoyable the task would have been if I had had…
Read MoreMy Greatest Fear
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.…
Read More100 Things I’ve Learned in 100 Births
So, my 100th birth happened last week, just before midnight on the 12th. 100 births since 2008. 44 doula births. The other 56 births were as a midwifery assistant and student. Those began January 29th, 2014–my late father’s birthday. The birth of a new life, and the birth of my midwifery journey. A significant day…
Read More5 Things Midwives, Doulas, and Postpartum Moms Love
As I was in the shower today, after two births in 24 hours–one in the hospital as a doula, the other at home as a student midwife–I was appreciating the perfect temperature of the water, the smell of my shampoo, and the utterly clean feeling I had when I stepped out onto the mat. I…
Read MoreGrace Under Pregnancy: Responding to Horror Stories
We’ve all heard the horror stories. The homebirth turned cesarean. The induction gone wrong. The horrible hemorrhage. Cracked and bleeding nipples. Breastfeeding sabotaged by circumstances. And more. There is almost a compulsion to tell these stories, and we are often left feeling a little dazed as we walk away. These are valid experiences, but hard…
Read MoreA Doula For The Dying, Part 2: 5 More things I learned while doulaing my dying father.
When I set out to be by my father’s side in 2012, I had no idea what to expect. My sister and I both lived in Colorado Springs, so naturally we caravaned to Oregon together. We talked about it a lot. What would we have to do? How would we help our mom? This was…
Read MoreA Doula For The Dying: 5 Things I Learned at My Father’s Deathbed
Almost three years ago, I packed up my four children and drove to Oregon to help care for my father. His melanoma had metastasized to his spinal fluid, and everything that could be thrown at it to kill it, had been. There was nothing left, but to wait. Probably only weeks were left. His decline…
Read MoreBreath & Wings: A Mother’s Day Post
Her new wings are still unfurling, tender and delicate. A flutter here, another in a moment. Quiet! There she goes. Uncertain, her feet have left the ground anyway. “Now is as good a time as any!” Her wings straighten and thrust her into open air. Not yet soaring, she hops and jumps and keeps testing…
Read MoreGrace Under Pregnancy: Responding to Negativity
We’ve all seen those blog posts listing all the hilarious, snarky retorts we can have at our disposal when well-intentioned people make comments about our pregnancy, parenting, or birth choices. There is definitely a place for a well-placed one-liner, but not everyone will see the joke. Those remarks are most often only appreciated in theory,…
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